Thursday, April 3, 2008

The Post I Thought I Never Would Post . . . Post

I am anticipating the people in my life nearest and dearest to me . . . the Dad, my girls, and some boys, the Barista at Starbucks, the neighbor lady, the nurses' line at my OB/GYN clinic, etc. will love to reach out across the Internet and punch me in the face for saying this . . . but . . .

I think I miss being prego.

I was having a text-convo with a mama friend of mine last night and I accidentally typed out a similiar sentiment, then laughed about it, trying to redirect myself. I mean, c'mon. The lil' dude will turn exactly four months old in four days . . . we are still paying off the hospital bills, receiving baby gifts (as recent as yesterday, where the hell are those thank you cards again?), and trying to figure out parenthood each day (why is she getting up so early for two days in a row? Does she need to eat more?). The stretch marks are still a violent reddish color, not yet a more subtle but-still-not-ever-going-away silver.

And I just said I miss being prego?

It's certainly not baby fever, No, no, NO. That I am sure of. Granted, there are people in my life with growing bumps and baby plans in their imminent future, I can't help but get caught up in all the anticipation and wonderful cluelessness of what having a baby entails. Yes, I remember the crap parts of pregnancy. No alcohol on my fave peeps' birthdays, the inability to wear all my delicious high heels, wearing the same pair of dull maternity jeans all week long, burning heartburn, aching ribs, adult acne . . . I vividly remember it all.

It was this time last year, on March 23rd to be exact, the Dad and I found out were expecting the lil' dude. I can't help but associate each day of this year, unprego, with last year. I wonder who else out there found out about their lil' dude on March 23 of this year and optimistically circled November 27 on their calendars like we did? It's still relatively new for me to plan things out without automatically thinking "I'm pregnant, does that change things?" like camping this summer, planting a vegetable garden, and you know, staying up past 8pm during the week.

I think today I'll take extra birth control pills just in case karma really is a bitch.

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